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WOOOOO Let's Get After It! WDT 7/29/11

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Blue Dog, Jul 29, 2011.

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  1. Beefy Phil

    Beefy Phil
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    The devious cunt parked himself right in front of the bulb. It's like looking into the sun. I'm going to send his corpse to his fucking children, and drink his blood from a tiny chalice.
     
  2. Beefy Phil

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    What the fuck is he doing with his ass? Is he shitting on my fucking light? Is this fucking bee shitting on the things I own?
     
  3. Beefy Phil

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    Now he's looking at me. I swear to Christ, this piece of shit is staring me down.
     
  4. Angel_1756

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    This is what the drunk thread has become? The play-by-play of Beefy Phil chasing a bee around his kitchen?

    Unacceptable.

    [​IMG]
     
  5. Racer-X

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    Is it an incandescent bulb? If it is, squirt it with a little bit of water. The bulb will explode and with any luck kill the bee in a spray of hot glass. You'll need a new bulb but it will be a spectacular victory.
     
  6. Beefy Phil

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    There is no honor in that.
     
  7. Chellie

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    Bullshit, there is great honour in winning by tactical superiority. It's like when Ghengis Khan catapulted heads of dead, rotting enemies into whatever city that was and gave them all some freakin plague and let them die while he waited in siege. Crush the enemy with whatever means are at your disposal.

    Jesus, apparently getting stood up makes me mean.
     
  8. bebop007

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    The only proper way to kill bees/wasps/hornets etc. is to behead them with a fly swatter while shouting "There can be only one!"

    .............Or so other people have told me.
     
  9. Beefy Phil

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    Madam, we live in a world that has bees, and those bees have to be killed by men with magazines and remote control helicopters. Who's gonna do it? You, Angel_1756?

    I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for bees and you curse the lack of booby pictures. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that this bee's death, while absurd, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth, because deep down in places you don't talk about in Internet forums, you want me in this kitchen. You need me in this kitchen.

    I use words like "bees", "bee-rape", "bee-slaughter". I use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a woman who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "Thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a copy of the New Yorker, roll it into a cylinder, and stand a post.

    Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.
     
  10. Angel_1756

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    Or, instead of going for brawn, go for brains.

    Shaving foam, hair mousse... any of these foamy sweet-smelling things, are great. Sneak up on the bee, cover in foam, allow to suffocate. Is it humane? No. Does it work? Yes. Do you run the risk of covering your home in shattered glass? No. Do you end up stalking around with a newspaper for 45 minutes while internet strangers wait for your latest updates? NO.

    However, in lieu of any other posts of interest, carry on soldier. Kill 'im good.
     
  11. Noland

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    Can of aerosol something and a lighter makes an instant flamethrower.
     
  12. Chellie

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    And yes, to answer all the rep questions about getting stood up, I DID, in fact, just break up with the man 10 days ago. I wanted a rebound hump, is that so wrong? I HAVEN'T HAD SEX IN MONTHS!!!!
     
  13. Angel_1756

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    A song in honour of Beefy Phil's quest for glory:
    And a song because it's true:
     
    #133 Angel_1756, Jul 29, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  14. Racer-X

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    We didn't start this war and they're using chemical weapons.

    This is a war that must be won by any means necessary.
     
  15. WickedBitch

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    I haven't had sex in 2 years. (Don't get married, folks.)


    Focus: Because I haven't been drinking on weeknights for the last month, my tolerance is crap (if that's how you choose to see it). I've had barely a half-pint of rum and am hammered.
     
  16. Chellie

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    Better yet, Nom, come north, I have something for you to nom, and we all know how much you like that. I like it too, let's make it happen.
     
  17. Nom Chompsky

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    Who told you about that? Have you been reading my mom's blog again?
     
  18. Noland

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    No. Don't marry whoever it is you married. Some of us are doing just fine.
     
  19. Aetius

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    Dude, you're black. I'm pretty sure if you don't want to kill whitey the glorious dead of Harper's Ferry rise from the grave to revoke your man card.
     
  20. Nom Chompsky

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    Have you guys ever heard of Dr. Afrika? He's pretty good, he explained how McDonald's is symbolic of the homosexuality white people try to force on everyone.
     
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