Speaking of vaginas, I suspect that this music might suck. But it's too late, I like it and you can't stop me:
I have a little crush on Adam Levine, especially a shirtless Adam Levine. Although I feel that he looks a bit better now. So....now what were you saying about music?
Well, frankly I had never noticed his disproportionate thumbs before. Now I am repulsed. And Moves Like Jagger is musical crack.
Since we're posting topless men... This is the most inspiring picture I've seen in a while. Hemingway is photographed entertaining Vogue model Jean Patchett. Except he's drinking, no doubt rum or gin, topless, and shaped like a barrel. He does not give a fuck. He doesn't have to. She does. Like a boss.
The mojito or the "Papa" daquiri* are his favourite drinks. He fell in love with both of them in Havana while writing For Whom The Bell Tolls. Mojitos--fuck 'em for how "glamourous" they are up here, are my favourite drink. I grow a big batch of mint in my backyard every year just for mojitos and mint juleps. Papa Daquiri: Remove sugar syrup, double the rum.
I had a bad experience with a bottle of Smirnoff Mojito (I know, I know) years ago. Ever since that night I can't smell mint and alcohol together without my stomach turning. Someone ordered me a mojito at a Buffalo Wild Wings a while back, but it smelled solely of mint and tasted like water. My point is, fuck mojito. That stuff is evil.
Ok so this song is unequivocally awful, but yet so addictive. And also hilarious. http://soundcloud.com/thegirlscanhearus/you-want-i-i-want-it
I'm more of a wine gal than a cocktail gal, but i can never pass up a good mojito. And on that note, I am sadly on the wagon for the next month with this diet, so last night was my going out w/ a bang on Google+. And I didn't even felate any controllers. I think I was closer to the pass out drunk state than the wild drunk state.
I don't know about the rest of the dudes on this board, but kegels scare the living piss out of me. Women can basically do them whenever and WHEVER they want. It's a conspiracy. They're all going to rip off our tools with their flexo-flesh lettuce one day. Spoiler Vagina Dentata.. The El Chupacabra of the sex world.
What's scarier, a hole that can flex itself, or a large sausage like protuberance that is as hard as a rock that drunk guys try to jam all the way down one's throat? I think men win the whole, scary sexual organ, thing.
I'm well aware of Hemingway's drinking proclivities. The Hemingway Daiquiri is the pinnacle of the blended arts. Cup of ice, 3 OUNCES of silver rum, 1 lime, 3/4 ounces of grapefruit juice, drizzle of Maraschino liqueur. Blend that sucker up until it's a frothy slushee. Fucking amazing. The Papa Doble. He came up with these sugarless ones because he was trying to keep his diabetes in check and too much sugar meant he couldn't drink as many in one sitting. Shit I'm smacking my lips; might have to make one. I'm also with you on the Mojito. I don't consider them a poofter drink because NOBODY makes them right. You'd figure down here in South Florida it'd be a staple, any retard could do something 100 times a night consistently. Wrong. They consistently fuck it up. Bottled mixes, gloopy sour mix, fake lime, fake mint, too much sugar or not enough. It really isn't that hard to do right. The Key Lime is my secret weapon. So much more flavor than a regular lime. I throw those into mine. 12 mint leaves muddled, 3/4 ounces key lime juice (or 1 ounce of regular lime juice), 1 ounce simple syrup, ice, 2 ounces rum, shake or stir it up cold, fill with soda water, stir again, top off with soda water. Use bottled lime juice for consistency. One lime doesn't necessarily give out the required quantity. You need 1 ounce on the dot or else it throws the whole thing off.
Well, kegelcizers aside, ben wa balls are basically just a fun sex toy. If you've never had sex with ben wa balls in, you should totally try it. Also, there's apparently this subsection of men desperately trying to convince their women to do kegels, but also trying not to get murdered by saying, like, "man your vag is loose." The answer to that is buying ben wa balls and then just suggesting sexual play time and hoping she decides to experiment later (in case any of you are in this predicament. Is this a thing, or do I just have some weird friends?)
I like to make them feel good while still getting my point across. The key is to go down on them, and while you're face to face with her drizzly piccolo, look up and say, "Your pussy is so BEAUTIFUL, beautiful beautiful beautiful..."