How do you answer the "where do you see yourself in 5 years?" interview question when the truth is "I'm not thrilled to even be applying for this position?" Bonus points: answer without lying.
................Tricky hobbits!? ...? I almost felt bad about saying I don't follow that because I'm drunk, but hen I remembered where I am.
Last time that was asked of me I laughed and said that anyone in this industry would be lucky to be able to see 6 months out. 5 years? Please. He got pissy and asked for an answer, so I told him I see myself drinking Mai-Thais on the beach after winning the lottery. I ended up getting an offer but passing on that job, and got a call back by their HR asking why I'd turned it down. I told her that their interview process was too hung up on BS crap like that "5 years" question rather than the shit at hand. That's not the kind of company I want to work for. She didn't really know how to take that.
That's what kills me. When you are interviewed for a job, it's a two way street. You should be interviewing the company just as much as they're interviewing you. (Assuming the job actually means something to you and you plan on being there for any length of time) Soooo many people I interview don't do that, and treat it like a one way process. People not asking questions speaks just as loudly as the answers they give to the questions you do ask.
I see myself successful in (x industry), bringing creative solutions to current problems. I mean, it's a resume answer, and hard to pull off face to face, but if you say it with enough conviction, the job that you don't want will be yours.
"I'm planning to continue with <certification/study/whatever> in parallel with developing complimentary skills in a job much like the <whatever> role that we're discussing today in a company like <this one> with an aim toward moving into <a role one or two levels above the one I'm applying for, or team leadership>. On a longer term basis, I'd like to look into more senior leadership options and potentially entrepreneurship as I develop more experience." No lies, and makes it sound like you'll do what you're told, when you're told, and work hard so that you can tell someone else what to do in a few years. What goes unspoken is of course that despite planning those things, I'll get far too wasted to study shit outside of work, because the very thought of this job makes me so depressed that I can barely muster the energy to spark up my bong, and I'm only applying because I need to stop drinking moonshine before I lose sight in the other eye. Also? By 'leadership' I mean 'anything that doesn't involve actual work but pays a shitload of money'. Entrepreneurship at this point is looking like a fancy way of saying 'dealing to my friends' or turning tricks downtown. Or possibly consulting in this field, which is basically the same as sucking dick for crack anyway.
Can I tell you how much I love what you just interpreted of what I said before? Probably not. Too drunk, and about to be too high (why can't i make alcohol and weed work together? I melt into the floor) to tell you, but yes!
No idea what is happening here but I know the thread is hours away from being closed. I won't feel bad for being Debbie Downer. Recently someone I knew jumped from a hotel roof and died. A week later a dear friend who was grieving for the jumper lost his son to cancer. Suck all around. Wow. But, I have this to say to my girl: My daughter, you are everything to me. Everyday my heart swells bigger with the level of love I feel for you. No one could have prepared me for the love I have for you. You're 22. It gets bigger every day. I might just explode. So TiBber's, I don't know. Win some, lose some. You'll find me at the bar.